!!!LATEST NEWS!!! The Order of Merit has been completed for yet another successful year (but more of that later).
The course was in good condition, albeit with Winter Rules in force, on a damp day, which got very damp later in the day, and the Society had a great turnout with several very welcome guests and potential members.
With concentration on the 'Race' and on the day’s competition at Lambourne at fever pitch, the number of fines was slightly lower than normal but with the usual recidivists cropping up. Paul Healy asked Darren if he had the cards whilst standing in front of Frazer waving all the cards in his hand. Luke, for the last time his name is Alan! and, a naughty boy not raking the bunker on the 14th. Bryan dropped his draw ticket in the floor, showed off by chipping in twice, left his wedge behind on the practice putting green and had Paul pick it up for him. (Paul was fined for being nice). Ian called Darren the short fat dumpy one (that may be true, but have you seen Ian Woosnam recently for comparison!). Ian T was also fined for setting the longest drive on hole with water in the middle so the long hitters could not use a driver (didn’t make any difference to Captain as the water was too far and hitting straight didn’t seem an option either). It didn’t make any difference to John T either as he used a 3 wood to win.
Alan turned down an extra bacon roll and left his wine behind at Leatherhead (Captain kindly retrieving it for him). Colin Turvill………...Lost ball Colin? It was found it in the middle of the fairway. John T doesn’t seem to know the difference between match and stroke play and those sexy rubber slippers made a not unwelcome return. Peter Carfrae, Prev and Ian T not one of whom seemed to be able to add up. Chris T was out of bounds with his drive on 1st hole; Frazer dug his own bunker on the 14th fairway and Dave Shorter managed to chip into a ditch from 3 feet as well as putting like a s**** until 17th and 18th holes.
And now back to the Merit competition…. Bryan led into the day with a healthy lead of 5 points over Johns F and T in joint 2nd place. A bit of gamesmanship was in evidence as Bryan flashed his legs from his shorts, John F wore an aid to protect his golfers (allegedly) elbow and John T ordered a buggy to protect his Achilles. For the two chip-ins on the course Brian was suitably fined, but he played very well to handicap for a convincing win. John T managed 3 over handicap to come 2nd but John F had a very bad back nine in the rain (according to his Garmin it was his worst round for 4 years!) and the computer never lies.
The search is now on for a suitable high roller or potentate with deep pockets (and who is nice to his daughters and his wife) to fund a lavish prize that we could all get used to for the Merit race, for our efforts and self-sacrifice throughout the years. If any members can think of a few suitable candidates, please write their names on a postage stamp and give to the Captain when you next see him. Don’t forget, in case you weren’t sure, the word Dubai has already been used.
The event and OOM winner, Bryan Carter below being congratulated by Captain:
Roving reporter: John Thorp